Audience Participation: Venue Voting Time!

With a whole ten venues visited now in our search for a place to have our October 2010 wedding, I would like to ask for a little bit of audience participation. 

You've all seen the ten venue search blog posts that I have put up on The Groom's Take, and you've seen my opinion as well as some glimpses of Katelyn's opinion on each place. 

Now I want to know what you all think.  Please vote in the poll on the left side of the blog to give Katelyn and me a sense of how you all feel as you look at the places we have visited.  The vote will remain open until next Wednesday afternoon.

Feel free to leave some comments about why you voted for the venues you liked as well; that's even more useful to us as we try to make our decision.

Note: The text below the choices that is hard to read (and can't be changed, unfortunately) says that you may select multiple answers, so feel free to choose as many or as few venues as you like.  Of course, narrowing it down to one is the most useful, but Katelyn and I both know how hard it is to do that.

Also, apparently the polls application through Blogger isn't very stable.  If it isn't showing up for you, try refreshing the page.  If that doesn't work, you may have to come back later to vote.

Venue Search #10: Linekin Bay Resort in Boothbay Harbor, ME

And here we are, the final venue to discuss from our marathon of venue visits this past weekend.  Just a little ways up the Maine coast from Bailey Island lies Boothbay Harbor, Maine, another popular destination for my family growing up.  At least once every summer, my family would go up to Boothbay Harbor, go shopping in the town's stores, and go on a seal cruise out into the harbor and the ocean to see the seals sunbathing out on the rocks.  Boothbay Harbor was the site of my parent's honeymoon (they got married in Lewiston at St. Joseph's church and had their reception at Lost Valley in Auburn), so there's a bit of a family history involved with this location as well.

Once again, I got to see a new side of an old destination through our visit to the Linekin Bay Resort in Boothbay Harbor, Maine.

Venue Search #9: The Driftwood Inn on Bailey Island, ME

This venue search post needs to be prefaced by a short family history.

My grandmother on my father's side, Eleanor Parker, was killed in an automobile accident less than a mile from her home in Lewiston in January 1984.  The driver of the other car, who survived, was under the influence of marijuana and alcohol when he hit her car as she was driving from work.  She was cremated and her ashes were spread in the ocean off of Land's End on Bailey Island, ME.

Growing up, Bailey Island was a popular destination for my family.  If it was a slow weekend, sometimes we would just drive out to the ocean there and fly a kite, or shop in the gift shop at the end of the road.  For my brother and me, it was the only way to connect with a grandmother we never got to meet.

This past Sunday, a rainy September Sunday, Katelyn and I made the familiar drive (to me, anyway) to visit The Driftwood Inn on Bailey Island, Maine.

Venue Search #8: On the Marsh Restaurant in Kennebunk, ME

There is a problem with visiting venues that you do not have pricing information on, and that problem is that you might just fall in love with a venue that is far outside of your price range.  Of course, at the end of the afternoon last Saturday when we had just left the worst venue of our visits that day (Ocean Woods Resort), all Katelyn and I wanted was to visit a venue that we could potentially see ourselves having a wedding at.

We fell in love with On the Marsh Restaurant in Kennebunk, Maine.  It is far outside our price range.

Venue Search #7: Spring Hill in South Berwick, ME

After "crashing" weddings at the Dockside Guest Quarters and Clay Hill Farm, we moved much further inland from coastal Maine to the town of South Berwick.  My mom, Joan Parker, had found and suggested this venue to Katelyn and me and she had actually gone through the trouble of contacting the owner in advance to let him know that we were coming.  While we weren't aware of the venue's hours (not opening until 5:30PM; we showed up at noon), we were able to meet up with my mom's contact and get a quick tour of the venue.

This is a venue in our price range, so read on for more thoughts on Spring Hill in South Berwick, Maine.

Venue Search #6: Dockside Guest Quarters in York, ME

As I mentioned in the last post about venue outtakes from the weekend, checking out potential venues on a Saturday in September has its drawbacks; chief among them, of course, being that many venues are being used to host a wedding ceremony.  This was the case when we arrived at the first venue of the weekend, the Dockside Guest Quarters in York, Maine.  However, we were able to check out the reception building and get a quick glimpse of how the wedding ceremony was set up on the grounds while the ceremony was happening.

Venue Search Outtakes #1: Places that don't fit our wedding.

Well, as you readers know, this past weekend Katelyn and I went to southern Maine for two reasons; to visit my parents in Lewiston, and to see in person as many of the venues as we'd been looking at online as we possibly could in the span of two days.  I adopted a tactic that may or may not have been the best way to go about looking at places, and that tactic was (for the most part) not letting places know that we were showing up to see their venues.  My thinking was that if we could see the venue as it normally is (not all made up by the staff for our scheduled visit) we'd have a better idea of what to expect, and also that the behavior of somebody startled by our visit would be a good indication of how they would behave if we had our wedding at their venue and something went wrong in the planning for whatever reason.

Of course, the thing I forgot to take into account was that it was a Saturday in peak September wedding season, and so many of the places we ended up visiting actually had weddings going on when we arrived.

Regardless, we were able to see most of the venues we'd set out to see, and we were at least able to get a sense of whether or not a venue would be something we can consider for our own wedding.  This post is a wrap-up and reflection upon the places that would not work out for us.  That way, with this business out of the way, I can move along to places that we did like and are better suited for us.

Note: There won't be any pictures in this post because we really didn't photograph places that we knew wouldn't work for us.  I will, however, include the website links in case you are interested in visiting the venue sites.

Wedding Venue Weekend (September 26th & 27th, 2009) Preview

Katelyn and I finally got a free weekend to visit my parents in southern Maine, and we took advantage of the opportunity to visit a bunch of the venues we've been looking at through their websites.  Since we ended up visiting almost ten venues (!) over the two days, there's a lot to go over and I'll need a little bit of time to post pictures and reactions in the next few days.

In the meantime, I figured I would post the venues we visited in terms of our level of interest in them, along with some website links for all of you readers to check them out based on how they promote themselves.  Hopefully I'll be able to cover most of the venues in individual posts before the weekend.

One final note before I start listing the venues; all of the venues have been added to our Google Map of potential venues, and the color key has been updated to reflect our feelings after visiting many of the locations.

Groom as Venue-Caller Round 2

Not as much of a story lead-in this time around, just another set of venues that I've personally contacted to try and glean more information from as Katelyn and I look ahead to a weekend of venue-shopping in the general southern Maine area.  As you might be able to tell from our potential venue map that I posted earlier today, we're definitely building up more and more of a list to pick from so that we can be sure, when we finally make a decision, that we exhausted as many options as possible before deciding on the place that is right for us.

As per usual, click the link below to check out the new information on contacted venues.
 

Potential Wedding Venues Map

Using Google Maps' fancy map-making tool, I have just put together a map of the venues that Katelyn and I have visited, are planning on visiting, and have already ruled out in our venue search.  Hopefully this will help us in our travel plans as well as give our out-of-state guests the opportunity to see the scope of our search and make the best plans for traveling into the area.

Click the link below the map to view the map on a bigger scale.


View Potential Wedding Venues Map in a larger map.

For those who don't click to view the larger map, here is the map key:

• Red locations are locations we're favorably considering.
• Yellow locations are possible choices that we have visited.
• Green locations are places we haven't visited yet.
• Light Blue locations are places we've visited and have mild interest in.
• Blue locations are venues that are not well-suited to us or do not have openings and won't be considered in our decision.

New locations will be added to the map as we find them and visit them, so be sure to check back to this post or the map in the future for the most up-to-date information.

House-Groom-to-Be

There is one major aspect of my relationship with Katelyn that is a concern to me as things are right now, and that is the fact that I do not make anywhere near as much money as Katelyn does through my work.  As a person who went through high school and college always working and always having enough money to take care of things, this is a new position for me to be in, and it is a somewhat embarrassing position to be in as Katelyn's fiancé and supposed provider.  I wonder how people feel when they look at this relationship from the outside, because from a traditional standpoint (and a gender-biased standpoint), the man is supposed to be the main provider for his family.  I know that Katelyn's family loves and accepts me, but I still fear sometimes that an outsider might view my current relationship with Katelyn as parasitic because while I contribute love and happiness, I am unable to contribute financially.

This is what it means to be a House-Groom-to-Be.

Venue Search #5: Alamoosook Lakeside Inn in Orland, ME

After we were done at The Pilgrim's Inn in Deer Isle, Katelyn and I drove back inland to see a venue recommended by a friend of mine from college, the Alamoosook Lakeside Inn in Orland, Maine.  To my surprise, the venue isn't located very far from our current hometown of Blue Hill.  In fact, I pass the turn to go to this venue every Tuesday and Thursday on my commute between the apartment and work in Bangor.  While we found a sign on the door saying that the inn was closed for the day when we arrived, Katelyn and I took the opportunity to look around the grounds a little bit and see what kind of interest we might have in the venue.

Venue Search #4: The Pilgrim's Inn in Deer Isle, ME

While our weekend plans of going to southern Maine to look at potential wedding venues took a hit because of Katelyn needing to work this past Saturday, I was determined not to let a beautiful autumn Sunday in Maine go to waste.  We looked up a couple relatively-local venues online and decided to hit the road and see what we could find.  Our travels brought us first to Deer Isle, Maine, and a little inn by the sea called The Pilgrim's Inn.

Groom as Venue-Caller

Earlier this week, I decided that I would take some stress off of Katelyn's shoulders and personally contact a number of venue locations that we'd been interested but hadn't been able to find more specific information about in terms of pricing, catering, and how many people they could accomodate.  The initial plan had been to narrow down a list of venues to visit in-person this weekend when we would head down to southern Maine to visit my parents, but Katelyn had to put in Saturday hours at her architectural firm and that trip has been postponed until next weekend.  Regardless, I thought I would share some of the names of places we've been contacting and my experience as a groom calling these places for information.

Venue Search #3: Lucerne Inn in Dedham, ME

After our adventure going to Clark's Cove Farm last Saturday, Katelyn and I headed in to Bangor to finally pick up her car from getting various repairs done and finally earning its Maine license plates.  It seemed particularly important to get her car, given my car's new feature of leaking radiator coolant.  Never ones to miss an opportunity to visit a potential wedding venue, we turned off Route 1A on our way to the big city to check out our third venue in person.

On Sunday, September 13th, 2009, Katelyn and I visited the majestic Lucerne Inn in the town of Dedham, Maine.

Venue Search #2: Clark's Cove Farm in Walpole, ME

It's been a couple days since my last contribution to "The Groom's Take", and part of this has been dealing with my job as an adjunct instructor and working with my students on their first drafts of the semester. Always a time of the year where stress and tensions are high and I need to be able to keep a level head to help them through it. Since it's the weekend now and I have some free time with my poor fiancée putting in extra hours at work (I'm cooking family recipe crèpes for supper tonight to make that up to her), I'm going to catch up with documenting the venues we visited last weekend. Now that Greystone Manor is no longer an option (see the update on that post for more information), these venues take on even greater importance.

On Saturday, September 12th, 2009, Katelyn and I drove my car (leaking radiator coolant all the way) to Clark's Cove Farm in Walpole, Maine.

Quick Note

Since I tend to be a little verbose in my posting, I've decided to shorten what you see of each entry on this main blog page.  If you're reading an entry on the main page and it seems to stop suddenly, chances are you're not finished with the full entry yet.  If you click the text that says "Click here for the rest of the entry..." at the bottom of that particular entry, it will take you to the rest of the posting and you can continue reading.  This will help out in the long run because the main blog page will look less cluttered but you can still read all of my long-winded entries.

Thanks!

Unintentional Title Reading

This is something that is probably only immediately apparent for a word-nerd like myself, but I did feel like a little bit of commentary could be useful on it, if only to appease my grammatically-focused brain.  Long story short: the origins of this blog post have little to do with planning weddings or my wedding in particular, and a lot more with my English-major-mind getting caught up on an unintentional reading of this blog's title.

When I was originally setting up this blog, I had decided on the title Groom's-Eye-View.  It had a good ring to it, it had good internal rhyme, it was musical.  I had everything all set up and was poised to post my introductory blog posting and advertise on my Facebook page when I did a Google search to find that another Blogger user had already titled their blog A Groom's Eye View.  Crushed (not really, but it sounds more dramatic that way), I set about brainstorming a new title for the blog.  I knew that I wanted to include the word "groom" in the title, as this is one way I'm beginning to identify myself with all the wedding planning in the air, but I wasn't entirely sure what I was going to come up with for a title.  The first title had been perfect; I'd fallen in love with it.

Venue Search #1: Greystone Manor in Cape Neddick, ME

One of the "fun" things about getting engaged is that you then need to figure out where the hell you're going to have the wedding.  A number of considerations need to be made, ranging from how many people will be able to make it to the venue (particularly when you have a groom from Maine and a bride from Michigan) to how much money you can afford to put down.  Oh yeah, you need to make sure that it's the kind of place that will be memorable for years after the ceremony and suitable for the tastes of the couple too.

On Saturday, September 5th, 2009, Katelyn and I visited our first potential venue: Greystone Manor in Cape Neddick, ME.

The Proposal Story

Now that introductions have been made, I can move on to the event that has turned me into a Groom-to-Be.

On a few occasions during the summer of 2009, Katelyn and I had discussed the potential possibility of eventually getting married to one another.  On two separate occasions, we actually asked each other to marry (me first, her second), but without a ring or a sense of reality to these proposals, we just carried on as always.

As the month of August began approaching and our impending trip together to South Carolina got closer and closer, I began to think seriously about proposing with a real ring: my grandmother's engagement ring from my dad's side of the family.  I didn't want to propose while we were in South Carolina because we were down there for a wedding already: the marriage between Katelyn's cousin Ryan and his wife Cheryl.  I thought it would be tacky and vain to propose while we were on vacation for that purpose, so I waited.

An Opening Statement

As with anything that has a beginning, introductions are necessary.  Your author for the beginning of this journey (and the rest of it, hopefully) is me, 25-year-old groom-to-be Brian Parker.   I am a native of Lewiston, Maine and twice a graduate of the University of Maine located in Orono, Maine (Bachelor of Arts in English 2006, Master of Arts in English 2008).  I am currently living in the small coastal town of Blue Hill, Maine and beginning my fourth year as an instructor of college English and my second year at Husson University in Bangor, Maine.

Since I am a groom-to-be, there is also a bride-to-be and a particular story behind that.  Defying my expectations of the online dating world, I met Katelyn Cooper (the future Mrs. Parker) through the services of Match.com, which I joined in December 2008.  Ms. Cooper is also a Masters Degree holder, though her field is architecture and she works for a firm here in Blue Hill.  Our first date required us both to drive over half-an-hour on back roads in a snowstorm to make it to the "midpoint town" of Ellsworth (halfway between my residence at the time in Old Town and her place in Blue Hill) for a Sunday brunch together.  Neither of us knew what to expect upon departure that cold and snowy January day, and I'm sure neither of us would've predicted that I would propose to her with my grandmother's heirloom engagement ring after she got out of work on Tuesday, August 11th, 2009.  The proposal story will be visited upon in a future posting, though most people acquainted with us have already heard it.  We are tentatively planning to get married sometime in October of 2010, though there really aren't any details in place beyond that at this time.

Growing up, I never really had a particular vision of what my dream wedding would entail.  As children, boys aren't really encouraged to consider those sorts of things anyway; after all, we all know that it is the bride's special day and we just kind of stand up there with her and say "I do" before getting a ring, right?  Not as far as Katelyn and I are concerned.  And that's part of what this blog is being born out of; a desire for a wedding where both bride and groom have equal input and where the day is recognized as something equally important for both parties.  This may be a radical idea, for certain, but as long as us grooms-to-be have websites like The Plunge to counter traditional bride-focused sites like The Knot, there is hope for the future.

Whether or not Katelyn decides to blog on her own or simply interjects with the occasional posting on this blog, the hope is to offer The Groom's Take on what it means to plan a wedding today.

Welcome to The Groom's Take; I look forward to hearing feedback as this project continues along.